Sense of loss
I was trying to put together words that define the passing year in my life. There were good moments, there were bad ones. There was sorrow, of parting, of losing, of having to move on. Things that leave a bad taste.
I've moved into a new place - my 'hole in the wall' that I've begun to love. I got to read a whole lot of good books and enjoy all those lazy evenings in the solitude of my room reading some nice book. Started loving this city and the life that it offered.
I've travelled to at least some of the places that I've always wanted to see. There was an Udupi - kollur trip that was really pleasant and enjoyable. Then there was this mudumalai-masinagudi-ootty trip which was thrilling and relaxing. Then there are a whole lot of places that I've wanted to visit, but never got to :(
Then there is this endless waiting. Waiting for things to happen. Waiting for things that never happen, waiting for people who never turn up....
There is a pain when people go away, when you leave places, when movies end, when you reach the last page of a beloved book, when love fades away, when your favorite shop closes down, when a journey ends, when you give up things... the same feeling comes up when a year ends. A year that has brought in a whole gamut of emotions ranging from agony to Ecstasy, pain to joy, hollowness to fulfillment is slowing making it's exit.
And then there is hope. Hope that the coming year is going to bring something nice, something memorable. Hope that builds up during the beginning and then goes on diminishing as the days progress, something like the waxing and waning of the moon. Nevertheless, in the beginning, there is Hope...